How Many Communions Would It Take To Consume One Full Jesus?

When Christ poured his followers a cup of wine, he declared it to be his blood. When he broke them bread, he declared it to be his body. Centuries later, Christians practice communion by drinking wine and eating wafers. How much would you have to go through before you’ve consumed the equivalent one one Jesus?

Christ, by some estimates, was five feet and five inches tall (based on the average skeletal remains found from the same time). With this height, we can estimate a healthy, fit carpenter would weigh around 140 pounds. No one knows for sure, obviously, but we’ll accept this as truth- just have faith.

This means the Son of God would have about 1.3 gallons worth of blood based on his weight- about 11.5 pounds of Merlot in his veins. This leaves 129.5 pounds of weight we can attribute to being bread. Now we just have to divide both those numbers by the average volume of a communion cup for blood, and average weight of a communion wafer.

A communion cup, according to the 1000 pack I found on Amazon, holds 1.7 ounces of wine. 1.3 gallons of blood converts to 166.4 ounces. Divide that by 1.7, and we get 97.88 communion cups required to drink the full equivalent.

Wafers are far lighter, weighing about .25g (one fourth of a gram). For all 129.5 pounds of The Holy Savior, it would take 234,960.85 wafers. That’s, uh… a lot. More than you could eat in a month of Sundays. Or a year of Mass. In fact, it would take about 643 years, if you ate one a day.

This is assuming, of course, that we’d be consuming 100% Christ, with no added preservatives or filler from other deities.

If you’re looking to eat a full Jesus in your lifetime, I would suggest replacing wafers for more substantial bread- if you ate full baguettes (weighing 8.75 ounces), it would only take 236.8 of them to hit the full 129.5 pounds of Christ… how unfortunate he wasn’t French, otherwise this would be an easier issue to solve.

How Many Communions Would It Take To Consume One Full Jesus?

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